Sunday, August 19, 2007

12 Rules for Life

1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.

2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.

3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are "I apologize" and "you are right."

4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.

5. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.

6. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her - believe them.

7. Learn to pick your battles; ask yourself, "Will this matter one year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?"

8. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm.

9. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!

10. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right about you.

11. Work is good, but it's not that important. Money is nice, but you can't take it with you. Statistics show most people don't live to spend all they saved; some die even before they retire. Anything we have isn't really ours; It's on loan to us while we're here ...even our kids.

12. And finally...Be really good to your family and/or friends. You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan.

9 comments:

BusyMommy said...

I remember that haircut...

BusyMommy said...

I like number 3 best...anything you'd like to tell me? :p

Chris G said...

I'm sorry- you were so right :)

chelleybutton said...

#1 did sound like you were speaking from personal experience... but some of the others sound familiar -- did you get them somewhere? they're good! :) but I'm not sure I'm following all of them all that well... #2, for example...

Chris G said...

No- I didn't write it- just an email forward :)

chelleybutton said...

aw, too bad... i was thinking maybe you got a haircut after 3 margaritas :)

BusyMommy said...

What makes you think he has hair? (He does, I'm just wondering why you think that.)

chelleybutton said...

b/c i thought it was his own list at first :)

chelleybutton said...

his own rules i mean :)